Juice
Juicing is kind of expensive, or at least it felt that way. A lot of the extra veggies I was buying went into making juice, and there is so much of them that you put into the juicer and it only makes a glass-full! I know this is common sense and the basic laws of juicing, but throwing out a tub of vegetable “fibre” every morning takes a toll on someone who doesn’t like to waste. However, it really wasn’t all bad. I found that after a few mornings of green juice I started to get used to the taste, which is amazing considering the main ingredient in my juices was cucumber, a vegetable I really didn’t like too much previously. I’ve actually found myself craving green juice lately, which is, bizarre. Liquid breakfasts have become my norm and I felt almost lost about breakfast when I realised that in a few days time I wouldn’t have to drink my brekky every morning. I feel like I have a clear head and can really focus my energy when I’ve got my green juice and lime-water and meditation pillow and I’m working it, and it’s one of the elements of the diet I plan to keep as part of my every day routine, despite having to wash my juicer!
Veganism
Veganism is one of the things I thought I would have the most trouble with, but as it turned out, it was probably the easiest part of the cleanse to stick with. Despite every so often craving pizza (curse you Jamie’s 30min meals!) or the delicious “Heavenly Nachos” dip from Flannery’s I otherwise found it much easier than I’d anticipated. Eating vegan food out and about was also quite easy, so when I did indulge, I indulged in delicious vegan options. Although I can’t see myself being entirely vegan straight away now that I’m off the cleanse, I definitely plan to cut down on how many eggs and how much cheese I eat, and I’m definitely making the switch to Rice milk permanent. I think it was very clear to me that my digestion suffers when I eat too many animal products, and that it’s better for me (and for the earth) if I work towards cutting down how often I eat them, perhaps even cutting them out entirely.
…Raw, lightly steamed or sautéed vegetables should make up 60%-80% of your plate…
Eating Raw makes it near-impossible to eat out, which, by the way, is something I love doing. Even when ordering salads they usually come with some sort of non-vegan friendly ingredient, like fetta or a creamy dressing, and sometimes when you take an ingredient out and don’t replace it you just end up with a plate full of rocket, which I consider an incredibly depressing sight. The diet doesn’t say “a plate full of salad every meal” it says “a rainbow of coloured vegetables” and that just isn’t available at many restaurants. The closest to the diet (without being the aforementioned plate of rocket) I could find in inner city Brisbane was sushi train, and even then the white rice was an unwelcomed compromise – but compromise I did, because some things are just worth compromising for (especially Shlix ice-cream!). Montezumas restaurant (one of which is located conveniently down my street) has a salad made of broccoli, carrot, parsley, celery, green apple and a whole lotta other vegetables which was a god send on a night when I just didn’t feel like putting in any effort – I just had to ask for it without dressing and cheese – easy peasy!
Knowledge
Following the CSD Adventure Cleanse and writing about it really made me want to know so much more about some of the ideas within the Crazy Sexy Diet philosophy. I watched the documentaries Food Matters and Super Size Me, and I’ve spent a lot of time researching raw foodism and nutrition as health care. The whole diet has been almost equal parts spiritual, physical and mental; spiritual and emotional – meditation and affirmations, physical – exercise and diet and mental – nutritional (but not in a counting calories every meal and snack kind of way) and learning (from books and docos but also from my body).
Conclusion
I stuck with veganism as much as practicality would allow (about 99% of the time) and I was gluten free except for the soy sauce I ate when eating out and the soba noodles (which at the time I thought were made from gluten free buckwheat…). If I count “wean week” (the week previous to the cleanse where I gradually cut gluten, animal products, processed foods and other acidic food from my diet) I lost 4 kilos.
Coming off the diet I admit I had a rather big blow-out on drinks, Pringles, a crepe, sour-dough baguette and a huge burger and chips from Grill’d, and I hate to say it for all you folks out there who want to believe that what you eat doesn’t make a difference, but I felt lethargic and mentally cloudy all day. Monday morning and I’m straight back on the horse – it just made me feel so good I don’t want to give it up. I won’t be sticking to it quite as strictly as I have for the last three weeks, that would be exhausting and probably socially destructive, but I will follow it as much as I can because the closer I follow it, the better I feel.
In the end I think what I learnt the clearest is that you choose what you put in your mouth. Sure, people and places and books and advertising can suggest something to you to eat, but essentially you have the choice to eat it or abstain from it if you want to. And you don’t have to abstain from “eating the bad things” every time either, because you have the freedom to choose when you want to treat yourself. It’s a diet, not a jail cell, but there also needs to be balance. That balance for me, I think I’ve discovered, has to be healthy, delicious meals made for the greater part of vegetables (raw and cooked) when I’m eating at home with treats once or twice a week, sometimes homemade, sometimes eaten out.
Related Posts: Crazy, Sexy... Diet?, Update Week 1, Update Week 2, Update Week 3
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Watching All The Tom Cruise Movies Ever Made: An Update
Awhile ago I posted about my New Year’s Resolution to Watch Every Tom Cruise Movie Ever Made. Well, I thought it was time for an update as to how that was actually going.
When I told friends and family about my awesome resolution, people scoffed. “You could do that in a week!” they cried. I laughed right back at them, knowing that they were severely underestimating my capacity to get sidetracked. So far I have watched three of the thirty-five, but fear not, I’m a long haul kinda gal and am in no way inexperienced at sprinting to the end of races or year long movie marathons.
The three films I chose to watch first were chosen because of perceived epicness and convenience and will be judged accordingly.
A Few Good Men
A Few Good Men has a crazy cast. Before I had the pleasure of viewing for myself, when I thought of the movie I thought of Tom, obviously, and Jack Nicholson. Did I think of Kevin Bacon? Demi Moore? Christopher Guest? No. Because no one had ever bothered to mention the epicness of A Few Good Men’s credits. Shame on you society.
The film was actually being shown on New Year’s Day night on television, and taking it as a sign that my resolutions were well aligned with the universe’s mystical workings, I decided to stay home and watch. Was this a convenient choice? Nope. A Few Good Men is a long, long, long movie. Made longer by ad breaks and my post New Year’s sleepiness, I can’t say I really enjoyed the experience of falling asleep slowly only to jerk awake to the image of Tom Cruise drunkenly blubbering or Jack Nicholson taking part in a spit-spreading competition. I do remember, though, hazily thinking that if I was awake it would probably have been quite a good film, so there’s some points there.
Final Judgement: Epic? YES. Convenient? No.
Best Moment: The moment when you think Tom might just dump Demi for a uniformed Kevin Bacon.
Worst Moment: Every time Demi Moore sighed, shook her head, and offered up absolutely no ideas. Way to win it for the girls, Demi.
The Outsiders
It should be noted that Tom Cruise is hardly in this movie. Also hardly appearing are Rob Lowe, Emilio Estevez and Tom Waits. Patrick Swayze is cool and gets a few more lines.
It’s an odd movie, kind of seamless and a little short on the plot detail. Things just…happen…in The Outsiders, and the movie tries very little to explain itself. It’s refreshing, but also a little perplexing at the same time. I watched it while I was holed up in my apartment for a week, not able to leave due to the crazy-time floods, and so maybe my cabin fever was starting to set in while I watched. I kind of liked it and kind of didn’t, and I think it’s one I’d recommend to people just to watch their faces crease confusedly as mine did.
Final Judgement - Epic: In terms of very minor roled supporting cast? Yes. Convenient: If you’re stranded in your house while infesty water rises and slowly swallows your for days on end, sure, why not.
Best Moment: I’m not sure, did I like any moments?
Worst Moment: Ditto.
Top Gun
I watched it, I didn’t like it, I wouldn’t buy the T-shirt. To be honest, I don’t think the phrase over-hyped could be better applied to any other phenomenon. Have they just used the same footage of planes flying and crashing and flying and flying over and over and over again? I think so. Do all of the bits that look really good on ‘Top Ten Movie Moments Ever’ clips make absolutely no sense in context? None whatsoever. Why do people like this movie??
Final Judgement - Epic Rating: This film is pretty epically repetitive. Convenience: Not very if you’re already afraid of flying.
Best Moment: “They were abused children”. This made me laugh. Funny character’s name is Goose. After this my laughter switched subtly from with the movie to at the movie.
Worst Moment: The sex scene. Okay, so some people think it’s hot. And maybe I would have thought so if I hadn’t been so completely taken out of the moment at the point where she started licking his chin. WHY DID SHE DO THAT? WHO DOES THAT? DO YOU DO THAT? I DON’T!
Crazy Sexy Update: Week Three
DAY SIXTEEN: Today I made the decision that this week I would try as many new recipes from the book as possible (many include ingredients that aren’t available here, even in the finest Health stores, or the recipe requires a vegetable dehydrator. I do not have a vegetable dehydrator.) So today I tried the Thai “Peanut” Sauce Vegetables and it was absolutely delicious! Dusted off an old Yoga dvd and spent 45 minutes of my afternoon bending, stretching and relaxing.
DAY SEVENTEEN: Hit the gym this morning for a really epic cardio work out. Stuck closely to the diet and watched a few movies – generally a great day!
DAY EIGHTEEN: Today I woke up and downloaded a guided meditation, which got me off to a great start this morning! Totally motivated, I hit the library and the grocery store. Made some Southwest Black (red kidney) Bean and Roasted Sweet Potato Burger patties that I ate with some brown rice and guacamole – delicious! It was one of the first meals I’d eaten on the diet where more than just the grains were cooked, and it was a lifesaver, because all morning I’d been craving something hot and savoury. May have had them for lunch and dinner…
DAY NINETEEN: HOME STRETCH E’RBODY! Am really just very excited about finishing this thing. Had another burger or two today, they’re really good!
DAY TWENTY: So close! My skin is particularly glow-y today, and I’m feeling really great today. Have been putting lots of effort into relaxation and meditation in the last few days and it’s really paying off, I feel so Zen.
DAY TWENTY-ONE: Considering this my first day off the cleanse, especially since when I went to the markets this morning the juice lady wasn’t there, so I had a crepe instead, then we had a some baguette for lunch and delicious Grill’d burgers for dinner… And a few drinks after that. Felt really tired and lethargic in the afternoon and the drinks went straight to my head, although that isn’t surprising.
DAY SEVENTEEN: Hit the gym this morning for a really epic cardio work out. Stuck closely to the diet and watched a few movies – generally a great day!
DAY EIGHTEEN: Today I woke up and downloaded a guided meditation, which got me off to a great start this morning! Totally motivated, I hit the library and the grocery store. Made some Southwest Black (red kidney) Bean and Roasted Sweet Potato Burger patties that I ate with some brown rice and guacamole – delicious! It was one of the first meals I’d eaten on the diet where more than just the grains were cooked, and it was a lifesaver, because all morning I’d been craving something hot and savoury. May have had them for lunch and dinner…
DAY NINETEEN: HOME STRETCH E’RBODY! Am really just very excited about finishing this thing. Had another burger or two today, they’re really good!
DAY TWENTY: So close! My skin is particularly glow-y today, and I’m feeling really great today. Have been putting lots of effort into relaxation and meditation in the last few days and it’s really paying off, I feel so Zen.
DAY TWENTY-ONE: Considering this my first day off the cleanse, especially since when I went to the markets this morning the juice lady wasn’t there, so I had a crepe instead, then we had a some baguette for lunch and delicious Grill’d burgers for dinner… And a few drinks after that. Felt really tired and lethargic in the afternoon and the drinks went straight to my head, although that isn’t surprising.
Monday, April 4, 2011
March In Review
Source: Seriously Cute
Things Ell-Leigh Has Loved:
CRAZY SEXY LIVING
Although I’ve complained about how restricting the Crazy Sexy Diet was, and although it took a lot of effort to clean my juicer almost every day, I really liked the Crazy Sexy Diet and the way I felt when I was on it. It also lead me to discover new foods like raw chocolate – I’m totally addicted! I’ve learnt so much about my body and about food while on this diet that I’m absolutely so thankful for it.
The Markets
This month I’ve hit the West End Markets (http://www.ourbrisbane.com/whats-on/markets/west-end-markets-review) twice and I love it! Not only am I buying fresher produce, but I’m also directly supporting local farmers. Not to mention cutting out the middleman saves me a pretty penny! It’s also a heck of a lot more exciting than spending the morning in a supermarket, the range of food and other products available is huge and really diverse.
Opening My Eyes
This month I’ve had a lot of experiences where I’ve come into contact with someone or something that gave me a small flash of how diversely people think and wide a range of experience there is around us. Sometimes we get stuck thinking that our friends and relatives all think the same way we do, and that we assume we know what other people are thinking because of a certain way they dress or behave. Sometimes we’re right. Sometimes our assumptions give them a lot of credit and the truth of the matter is far worse than we could even think of. Or sometimes we’re just plain wrong. I think making these assumptions is part of how we communicate and deal with being around so many people we don’t really know so frequently, but sometimes, when you learn something beyond those assumptions it just makes you marvel (or at times, sit, absolutely horrified) at the wonder of people.
Things Lauren Has Loved:
Filling That Dance Card
When I’m busy, my levels of efficiency expand exponentially. It just so happens then, that cramming my social life full of activities allows me to work better. Not a bad perk, in my opinion. This month I’ve been crazy busy, with theatre shows, exhibition openings, comedy festivals, movie dates and night time picnics. I may have pushed it to the limit at times and rued my ever later bedtime, but March proved to be an incredibly productive month for me and I’ve had a ball throughout.
Workin’ Hard for the Money
Talking about hard work, I set myself the challenge of proving during March that I was up for as much as could be thrown at me, and I was pretty impressed with how I handled most things. There’s not much that can beat the satisfaction of knowing that you can do your job and do it well, except maybe for the satisfaction of doing this for multiple jobs at a time. Next step, world domination.
Planning Actual Plans (Not Pretend Dream Plans!)
It’s nice to dream, and I’m a big dreamer, but it’s much nicer to plan. I’ve been planning mostly for my upcoming trip to Melbourne, buying and printing tickets, designing outfits to beat the inevitable cold (if it doesn’t hit us in Melbourne, there’ll still be no avoiding it in Ballarat, which is our first stop), putting together snazzy outfits for my aunt’s ‘Old Hollywood’ themed 40th, booking rad accommodation and trawling the internet for ideas to fill my itinerary. I’ve also been planning for the coming months and thinking with that mixture of excitement and trepidation about the inevitable job change coming my way over the next year. I’m an embracer of change and I relish in the prospect of something new, just so long as I can carefully plan out every detail in advance!
Links We Loved and Liked To Share
March Playlist
Let’s Get It Started - Paris Wells
Under The Cover Of Darkness - The Strokes
Howlin’ For You - The Black Keys
Altamont Speedway - My Own Pet Radio
In the Summer - Loon Lake
The Truth - Pnau
Hello - Martin Solveig & Dragonette
Things We’re Looking Forward to in April
- Holidays! - Ell is going to Hawaii with her family, and Lauren is taking a trip to Melbourne!
- Easter times - chocolate hunts, family and Hot Cross Buns!
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Sunday Correspondence: A Letter to Our Pets
Dear Professor Charles Xavier Chewins,
(AKA Charlie Chew, Shmarlie Shmoo, Muttley Furface, Chew Man Foo, My Little Shmoo Shmoo, Charles Chewenstein, etc),
(AKA Charlie Chew, Shmarlie Shmoo, Muttley Furface, Chew Man Foo, My Little Shmoo Shmoo, Charles Chewenstein, etc),
I’m writing to say sorry about the whole moving to Brisbane thing. I hear that it’s been really hard on you, with the terms “depressed” and “a broken puppy” being used to describe you lately. When I heard that you’d even taken to not chasing after your fish toy I have to admit I started to worry.
You’re still my Shmoo Shmoo and the only puppy in my heart, my fluffy friend, and although you look ridiculous after your last haircut (oh, oh so ridiculous) I still think you’re the best dog in the whole world. Even better than K9, and he’s from outer space and knows The Doctor and Billie Piper. That’s kinda a big deal.
So I’m sorry we haven’t come back to visit you in a while, but I’m afraid our visits will probably only become less frequent. I’m sorry, and I miss you too! So much, my Shmoo.
Anyway, I’ll see you on Thursday night.
Love you lots,
Dear Godwin,
You nearly died this morning. I actually thought you were dead for a full five minutes, which was a bit awkward because I was just about to write this letter and I wasn’t sure what I would say to a dead fish. It was pretty intense you know, you were just hanging there, suspended at the top of the water all floaty and dead-like.
As much as I’d like to believe that your time tracking skills set loses out with your fish brain tendencies, and that this morning was a belated April Fools joke, I don’t think that’s the truth. You’re getting old, Godwin, and it’s showing. I’m not sure I’m ready for this, but I’m trying to keep in mind that it’s just natural progression. You’ve had a really good life, Godwin.
I remember when I first bought you home; you were so tiny and excited. A whole tank all to yourself! You used to love diving under the bubble jet and swimming endless loops around your new pad. It was delightful to watch, you seemed so content with so little.
You’ve been good company over the past eight months. I know people laugh… “A fish!” they say, “What can a fish do for you?!” But I know better. You’ve always been there to greet me in the morning, scrambling in that funny way you have at the top of the water for your breakfast. And you’ve always been there when I arrive home tired from work. You cheer me on with the frantic flapping of the fins that look just too small for your body and the wiggling of the tail that seems just too large. You’ve watched me while I’ve cooked dinner and not judged me when I’ve then taken it to the couch to eat in front of the tv. You’ve patiently waited each night for me to turn off your bubbles and light so you can go to bed and you’ve never once whinged that you’re sleepy, even if I’ve forgotten them and left them on all night. Godwin, you’ve been the perfect pet.
You’re pretty old, for a goldfish, I guess, though apparently you could have lived for twenty years, so what do I know? You’re pretty, very pretty, with your long white tail and orange and black spots. You’d drive the ladies wild in the wild, I’m sure.
Godwin, you’ve seemed so tired lately, hanging around on the rocks and staying out of the bubbles and I don’t know how many days your little body has left in it. I want you to know that it’s ok to go, Godwin, I’ll be ok. Sure, I might add a bit of saline to your tank water, but be happy in thinking that you’ll be remembered fondly.
Goodbye, Godwin.
Lauren
Ps. If you really aren’t dying, and you’ve just taken up extreme floating as a side-hobby, please let me know so I can stop gathering the housemates for impromptu mourning sessions. Cheers.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Plane Travel for the Uninitiated
source: mymodernmet.com
This is how not to travel by plane.
Camp finished and I was packing my bags to see some of the great cities the USA had to offer. Eventually airports became familiar. Popping my carry on liquids into their see through zip lock bag for the customs officers became a ritual that promised new adventure and excitement. Airline tags accumulated on my faithful backpack, which named after Sir Paul McCartney (cause I cart my stuff in it. Yeah… Pun.).
So here are my tips on how to travel by plane the right way;
- If you are vegetarian, make sure you have notified the airline that you’ll be needing a vegetarian meal. The vegetarian options are also often the vegan options, so prepare to drool over the person sitting next to you’s cheese and crackers, cause you may not get any.
- Drink lots of water in the days leading up to your flight, and skip the alcohol. I drank a couple the night before I left (I wouldn’t be able to drink legally in the states) and regretted it so very, very much. Get your hands on some green juice or coconut water as well, as these are brilliant for hydration.
- Bring a neck pillow, but not an old stretched out one. I found that the neck pillow that accompanied me all over the states (and was a saving grace for many nights I spent camped out under the stars) was pretty worn out by the time I flew home.
- Noise cancelling headphones are apparently a god-send for the weary traveller, according to my father. I have a lot of trouble sleeping on planes, as either I’m too excited about getting to my exciting destination to sleep, or I’m too excited about seeing family members and friends on my return to sleep either. So if you can afford it, try to fly with an airline that provides in flight entertainment through a screen in the back of the chair in front. I find watching movies or tv shows I haven’t seen before the best way to fight off boredom – the minute I decide to watch a movie I’ve seen before on a plane is the minute I lose interest.
- LIP. BALM. Bring a tub of it, of a brand you know and trust. I chose The Body Shop’s Strawberry lip pot, and it stuck with me through thick and thin, and is also nice and small for carry-on-luggage purposes.
- I took a sample size tub of moisturiser and body lotion with me on every flight and I did not regret it. The air-con in planes, although you may not feel it necessarily can really sneak up on you and dry out your skin. I recommend a nourishing and moisturising face-mask the day before you get on.
Friday, April 1, 2011
Lazy Shmazy; or, Ell-Leigh's too lazy to come up with a clever title.
Ell-Leigh says:
I had a really lazy day today. In fact, I’m having quite a lazy week. So far I’ve watched four movies, at least 10 episodes of Criminal Minds (the attractiveness of that cast is criminal, hohoho), read half a novel and am two chapters into another one, and it’s only Thursday. I’ve also hit the gym twice and dusted off an old yoga dvd. And I did a load of washing. This equals my total achievements this week.
I’m not complaining, in fact, I feel quite the opposite, as if I’ve stumbled upon a very undeserved holiday. However, I’m apprehensive of lazy weeks, because to my understanding they can often turn into lazy months, and even sometimes into lazy years, which in some unfortunate circumstances then morph into lazy lifetimes. Laziness isn’t for me. The more opportunities I take to be lazy, the less I seem to do and the more they seem to compound until I’m living on par with an actual sloth.
It’s not that sloths aren’t adorable, especially the baby ones. In fact, I may have made that point entirely to include a photo of a sloth (who could blame me?). It’s just that I’m not a sloth. I’m a person, and a particular type of person who puts a lot of pressure on themselves to meet a very high standard of success. Which makes the compounding laziness thing a problem, since if I’m lying about all the time watching Sense and Sensibility (GIANT SIGH, be mine, Colonel Brandon!) or wasting my time perusing the endless pages of my Tumblr feed I will never get around to making that Oscar winning film that is waiting patiently in the pages of my destiny, thus never fulfilling my potential and never meeting a high enough standard of success, etc, etc, unfulfilled life etc.
This is especially bad since I mostly work from home.
Compounding laziness, however, seems to be a societal issue. Super Size Me, the controversial documentary from a few years back tagged the obesity crisis in America to the convenience of fast food (read: laziness of consumers). The addictiveness of the products then lead to increased amounts being consumed, etc. I think however that my compounding laziness theory seems to point to lazy behavior as being addictive in itself. Gala darling recently posted a link to this article that likens television watching to heroin and hypnosis. The more TV we watch (a seemingly harmless way to pass a few lazy hours) the more we want to watch, and the hours in front of the box multiply, and before you know it you have a schedule from 11am (Ellen) to 3pm (The End of Dr Oz), then Family Ties and Mork and Mindy, followed eventually by Sabrina, and if you keep this up you can kiss those shiny red carpet dreams goodbye, Ell-Leigh.
On top of this we live in a world where convenience is king. You can get any type of food you like delivered – no need to cook or go pick it up. The Internet can provide you with movies, so no need to head over to Video Ezy or Blockbuster, they’re right here on your desk. You can even get rock hard abs in the comfort of your own home, thanks to the Ab Swing Pro, according to the infotainment I’ve watched so much of lately. The question is; where does convenience end and laziness begin? When did getting a pizza delivered once or twice a week become an acceptable norm? When did we start shunning the video store for the convenience of dvds delivered to our doorsteps? When did “it conveniently unfolds to fit under a bed” suddenly trump a gym membership that allows you to do more than just cardio with your abs?
There are garbage cans every 5 to 7 metres on my street. I still find litter. Yes, I’m writing an old person style rant about littering, but stay with me. These garbage cans are brightly coloured and there isn’t a moment when your eyes are open when you can’t see one. When did having this many garbage cans become necessary? And secondly, what on god’s green earth are people doing littering when the garbage can to resident ratio on this street is almost 2:1?
Having a lazy week is nice on occasion. In fact, this week has been super enjoyable all round, especially having the time to read so much. Convenience isn’t the devil either, in fact without modern conveniences like grocery delivery (for elderly/seriously busy types) and weekly visits from the garbage man modern city living would be impossible. The trick is to keep yourself in check. How much television is too much? Pick a number of hours that you’ll allow yourself to watch the idiot box and stick with it. If you have a few weeks where you know you’ll be able to waste a few hours, make them well wasted hours, with a facemask, a yoga session, some meditation or relaxation exercises, or meet up with friends. There is no need for one week of downtime to establish habitual laziness… Is there Ell?
Lauren says:
Laziness. We all hate it in other people, we all exhibit it ourselves. You know it’s true, in one way or another we all have our own lazy vice. I like to call mine Vazy (because obviously calling it Lice would be gross) and she sure does get plenty of exercise, especially on washing day.
Sometimes I stun myself at how much Vazy and I get along. At about eleven every morning we take a break together, usually just to hang out with a snack and some tv; it’s nice to take time out with someone as chilled as Vazy. This would be fine, except for the fact that the planned twenty minute break usually extends into a two hour procrastination interlude. But that’s what Vazy’s like, she knows how to suck you in and get you comfy and before you know it you’ll never be productive again. She can’t help it, it’s just in her nature.
As I said, Vazy gets particularly active, and I get particularly inactive, on washing day. Also on shower cleaning day. And on pamphlet drop off day at work. Or on car vacuuming day…in fact Vazy has worked her way in to many facets of adult life that I’ve decided I don’t really like to partake in. But there’s one thing that Vazy and I don’t do, one place where I draw the line, and that’s go out together in public.
Taking your Vazy, or your Lice if you prefer, out in public is pretty uncool, haven’t you heard? Apparently a lot of people haven’t, because I’m running into Vazy’s all over the place these days! I see them hanging around trash cans, loitering about a metre away where someone has decided to not quite bother walking their rubbish that extra step. I see gangs of them in movie cinemas after people leave, slinking about with the half empty drink cups and chewed on popcorn kernels littering the seats. Groups of them lay about on trains next to the scrunched up newspapers left half read and unwanted by the morning’s commuters and I’m pretty sure I catch a glimpse of one skulking in a public toilet every so often, when some silly has broken the flush mechanism but not bothered to let anyone know.
As much as me and my Vazy are good old mates when it comes to deciding between tv time and cleaning the fish tank, I’d like to think I know when enough is enough. After all, I need to make it clear to Vazy who is in control here, because she can be a pretty wilful creature; give her an inch and just you watch her think about taking a mile but then deciding not to because it’s harder than staying on the couch!
My point, dear people, is that Vazy’s are like special home treats. Like the cute/ugly fluffy slippers you wear at home*, Vazy’s are meant for leaving at the front door, where you step into your responsible in-public shoes ready to do the responsible and decent things people expect of you. I fear at the moment that we are breeding a ‘Culture of Vazy Dominance’, and that pretty soon there’ll be no turning back. It’ll just be plumber’s cracks views and very unparallel parallel parks that really required two more manoeuvrers everywhere.
What do you say? Ready to show your Vazy who’s boss?
*If your Vazy just piped up to reassure you that it’s really ok to wear your cute/ugly fluffy slippers out of the house, GET HELP NOW.
I had a really lazy day today. In fact, I’m having quite a lazy week. So far I’ve watched four movies, at least 10 episodes of Criminal Minds (the attractiveness of that cast is criminal, hohoho), read half a novel and am two chapters into another one, and it’s only Thursday. I’ve also hit the gym twice and dusted off an old yoga dvd. And I did a load of washing. This equals my total achievements this week.
I’m not complaining, in fact, I feel quite the opposite, as if I’ve stumbled upon a very undeserved holiday. However, I’m apprehensive of lazy weeks, because to my understanding they can often turn into lazy months, and even sometimes into lazy years, which in some unfortunate circumstances then morph into lazy lifetimes. Laziness isn’t for me. The more opportunities I take to be lazy, the less I seem to do and the more they seem to compound until I’m living on par with an actual sloth.
-actual sloth. Source: http://fuckyeahsloths.tumblr.com/
It’s not that sloths aren’t adorable, especially the baby ones. In fact, I may have made that point entirely to include a photo of a sloth (who could blame me?). It’s just that I’m not a sloth. I’m a person, and a particular type of person who puts a lot of pressure on themselves to meet a very high standard of success. Which makes the compounding laziness thing a problem, since if I’m lying about all the time watching Sense and Sensibility (GIANT SIGH, be mine, Colonel Brandon!) or wasting my time perusing the endless pages of my Tumblr feed I will never get around to making that Oscar winning film that is waiting patiently in the pages of my destiny, thus never fulfilling my potential and never meeting a high enough standard of success, etc, etc, unfulfilled life etc.
This is especially bad since I mostly work from home.
Compounding laziness, however, seems to be a societal issue. Super Size Me, the controversial documentary from a few years back tagged the obesity crisis in America to the convenience of fast food (read: laziness of consumers). The addictiveness of the products then lead to increased amounts being consumed, etc. I think however that my compounding laziness theory seems to point to lazy behavior as being addictive in itself. Gala darling recently posted a link to this article that likens television watching to heroin and hypnosis. The more TV we watch (a seemingly harmless way to pass a few lazy hours) the more we want to watch, and the hours in front of the box multiply, and before you know it you have a schedule from 11am (Ellen) to 3pm (The End of Dr Oz), then Family Ties and Mork and Mindy, followed eventually by Sabrina, and if you keep this up you can kiss those shiny red carpet dreams goodbye, Ell-Leigh.
On top of this we live in a world where convenience is king. You can get any type of food you like delivered – no need to cook or go pick it up. The Internet can provide you with movies, so no need to head over to Video Ezy or Blockbuster, they’re right here on your desk. You can even get rock hard abs in the comfort of your own home, thanks to the Ab Swing Pro, according to the infotainment I’ve watched so much of lately. The question is; where does convenience end and laziness begin? When did getting a pizza delivered once or twice a week become an acceptable norm? When did we start shunning the video store for the convenience of dvds delivered to our doorsteps? When did “it conveniently unfolds to fit under a bed” suddenly trump a gym membership that allows you to do more than just cardio with your abs?
There are garbage cans every 5 to 7 metres on my street. I still find litter. Yes, I’m writing an old person style rant about littering, but stay with me. These garbage cans are brightly coloured and there isn’t a moment when your eyes are open when you can’t see one. When did having this many garbage cans become necessary? And secondly, what on god’s green earth are people doing littering when the garbage can to resident ratio on this street is almost 2:1?
Having a lazy week is nice on occasion. In fact, this week has been super enjoyable all round, especially having the time to read so much. Convenience isn’t the devil either, in fact without modern conveniences like grocery delivery (for elderly/seriously busy types) and weekly visits from the garbage man modern city living would be impossible. The trick is to keep yourself in check. How much television is too much? Pick a number of hours that you’ll allow yourself to watch the idiot box and stick with it. If you have a few weeks where you know you’ll be able to waste a few hours, make them well wasted hours, with a facemask, a yoga session, some meditation or relaxation exercises, or meet up with friends. There is no need for one week of downtime to establish habitual laziness… Is there Ell?
- PS: 2 sloths! Source: http://fuckyeahsloths.tumblr.com/
Lauren says:
Laziness. We all hate it in other people, we all exhibit it ourselves. You know it’s true, in one way or another we all have our own lazy vice. I like to call mine Vazy (because obviously calling it Lice would be gross) and she sure does get plenty of exercise, especially on washing day.
Sometimes I stun myself at how much Vazy and I get along. At about eleven every morning we take a break together, usually just to hang out with a snack and some tv; it’s nice to take time out with someone as chilled as Vazy. This would be fine, except for the fact that the planned twenty minute break usually extends into a two hour procrastination interlude. But that’s what Vazy’s like, she knows how to suck you in and get you comfy and before you know it you’ll never be productive again. She can’t help it, it’s just in her nature.
As I said, Vazy gets particularly active, and I get particularly inactive, on washing day. Also on shower cleaning day. And on pamphlet drop off day at work. Or on car vacuuming day…in fact Vazy has worked her way in to many facets of adult life that I’ve decided I don’t really like to partake in. But there’s one thing that Vazy and I don’t do, one place where I draw the line, and that’s go out together in public.
Taking your Vazy, or your Lice if you prefer, out in public is pretty uncool, haven’t you heard? Apparently a lot of people haven’t, because I’m running into Vazy’s all over the place these days! I see them hanging around trash cans, loitering about a metre away where someone has decided to not quite bother walking their rubbish that extra step. I see gangs of them in movie cinemas after people leave, slinking about with the half empty drink cups and chewed on popcorn kernels littering the seats. Groups of them lay about on trains next to the scrunched up newspapers left half read and unwanted by the morning’s commuters and I’m pretty sure I catch a glimpse of one skulking in a public toilet every so often, when some silly has broken the flush mechanism but not bothered to let anyone know.
As much as me and my Vazy are good old mates when it comes to deciding between tv time and cleaning the fish tank, I’d like to think I know when enough is enough. After all, I need to make it clear to Vazy who is in control here, because she can be a pretty wilful creature; give her an inch and just you watch her think about taking a mile but then deciding not to because it’s harder than staying on the couch!
My point, dear people, is that Vazy’s are like special home treats. Like the cute/ugly fluffy slippers you wear at home*, Vazy’s are meant for leaving at the front door, where you step into your responsible in-public shoes ready to do the responsible and decent things people expect of you. I fear at the moment that we are breeding a ‘Culture of Vazy Dominance’, and that pretty soon there’ll be no turning back. It’ll just be plumber’s cracks views and very unparallel parallel parks that really required two more manoeuvrers everywhere.
What do you say? Ready to show your Vazy who’s boss?
*If your Vazy just piped up to reassure you that it’s really ok to wear your cute/ugly fluffy slippers out of the house, GET HELP NOW.
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